Perhaps we Need a Mondegreen Monday!

I LOVE MISHEARD SONG LYRICS And we know now because of Charles Harrington Elster that they are called mondegreens after a misheard stanza of a poem in 1954. I've got some good ones for you today and here's a list of the top mondegreens.  We want to hear yours!

BEFORE YOU CHEER APPLE CENSORING SPEECH As I'm sure some of you will when you hear that Apple has removed Alex Jones from ITunes because of his "hate speech", consider this.  Who at Apple decides what is "hate speech"?  Is there a hard and true formula where you if you violate x-y-z you are out?  I doubt it.  It's probably more a loose set of guidelines that some person uses to decide what constitutes hate speech.  This is very, very dangerous, although Apple has the full right to do so.  This should begin to change how and where people consume content and anyone who doesn't espouse the progressive mindset and hosts a podcast on Apple should be looking for other avenues to get their work out.  Alex Jones has his own website, so he should be fine, but what about other podcasters?  And how long is it before the Left starts eating it's own on this too?  

KATE MCKINNON DOES WHAT I ASPIRE TO DO Which is speak Hungarian.  Which is the MOST ridiculously hard language to learn.  Kate McKinnon rocks this.  

I CERTAINLY HOPE THE SPECIAL COUNSEL INVESTIGATE POSSIBLE COLLUSION WITH THE CHINESE And of course I'm being sarcastic because that won't happen.  It seems that Senator Dianne Feinstein had a Chinese spy as a driver for a mere twenty years.  TWENTY years.  So that smacks of collusion, doesn't it?  Again, I'm being sarcastic.  But this story sure is interesting.

MINIMUM WAGE DESTROYS OPPORTUNITY FOR YOUNG PEOPLE.  AGAIN. It doesn't matter how often it's tried, artificially forcing businesses to pay more than they are able means less work will be available.  Now Minnesota is demonstrating that once again with their minimum wage hike. And we're not even talking about a hike to $15 an hour here.  A new study comparing growth in Minnesota to growth in neighboring Wisconsin shows that young people are out of work because those entry level, low skill jobs are disappearing. 

THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TWIN THINGS I DON'T GET I've known my share of twins, some of them very close, some not at all.  But this story about two identical twins marrying two identical twins struck me as sweet but not something I could understand.  Why?  Because BOTH sets of twins had their hearts set on marrying other twins, so that's sweet, but why?  It's not for me to judge or understand, but good for them! 

EVERYBODY'S FAVORITE HOUSE MOM IS DEAD And of course I'm talking about Charlotte Rae.  Mrs. Garrett was the house mom in Facts of Life which was a show which made me sure I needed to go to boarding school.  RIP, Charlotte. 

BLACK LIVES DON'T MATTER IN CHICAGO At least when it comes to the other black people who are murdering black people on a regular basis there.  This weekend was pretty epic, even by Chicago standards.  Ten people were killed and 53 were wounded.  But they were all black people killing black people so Black Lives Matter has other things to do.  

THIS IS WHY ASPEN IS MY LEAST FAVORITE CITY IN COLORADO Now I haven't been everywhere yet, but I was less than impressed with the Aspen-y vibe.  It's pretentious times 10, and $120 nachos are just that.  

AND WITH THIS POLL, THE REPUBLIC IS LOST Because if we don't have a clue what our rights are, how can we expect anyone to defend them?  Because when only 1 of 1,000 people can name all of our First Amendment rights, we are done.  

A MANUAL TRANSMISSION FOILS A CAR JACKING Because young people can't drive a stick shift.  Which is why the Q's first car will 100% for sure be a manual transmission so none of her friends can drive it.  

I'M ALL FOR ARTISTIC LICENSE, BUT REALLY?  A production of The Diary of Anne Frank in LA replaced the Nazis with ICE agents.  I could not make this up if I tried. 

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