GET YOUR GRAMMAR QUESTIONS READY, CHARLES HARRINGTON ELSTER IS ON DECK! For another edition of Please Tell Me I'm Right! Find out more about Charles, grammar and words by clicking here.
JOHN MCCAIN HAS A BRAIN TUMOR And it's not just any brain tumor, it's an especially aggressive form of brain tumor. Pray for his fight if you're the prayerful sort.
SPEAKING OF CANDIDATES WITH A ZERO PERCENT CHANCE OF BEING PRESIDENT I present to you Maxine Waters, the nutbar Congresswoman from California who has become a favorite of Dems everywhere for her saucy and impertinent comments about the President. She will be 80 years old in 2020. She is headed to New Hampshire for some reason, and people seem to think she's going to run in 2020. But you go, girl, you go!
SPEAKING OF CANDIDATES WITH A MUCH BETTER CHANCE OF BEING PRESIDENT I present to you Kamala Harris, the former AG and now Senator from California. I TOLD you she was running in 2020 when she relentlessly questioned Jeff Sessions without giving a crap what his answers were. And now others are taking notice, just as she intended.
I HAVE NO IDEA WHY I AM FASCINATED BY WILD MONKEYS IN FLORIDA But I am. Perhaps because these monkeys are in my neck of the woods in Northern Florida, but I sort of love this story. Years ago, monkeys were brought to Silver Springs Park (fun fact: they filmed The Creature from the Black Lagoon and Johnny Weismuller's Tarzan movies there) as tourist attractions. They were put on an island and apparently no one bothered to ask if they could swim. They can. And now 50 years later, they have spread to rural parts of Florida and are now being aggressive to people. There is a Planet of the Apes joke here that I can't quite put my finger on, but I'm more inclined to wonder what happens when the rednecks get after them.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN INSTITUTIONS GO LEFT? This is an interesting thought by a deep thinking conservative, and he maintains that when they go left, they lose their way and purpose. He uses the latest brouhaha with Columbia having a pay a settlement to a young man they allowed to be bullied on campus after they botched a sexual assault situation. It's really interesting food for thought.
WHY I THINK TRUMP'S TRAVEL BAN IS A GOOD IDEA IN ONE COLUMN This is horrifying. Utterly horrifying. This column was not written by a right wing nationalist, this column was written by a woman who has pretty much dedicated her entire life to working with refugees all over the world. Afghan men in Europe are disproportionately sexually attacking women and the authorities have been happy to cover that fact up, lest they be called racist. She goes through many theories about why Afghan men are especially prone to this before dismissing them all and landing on this:
This brings us to a third, more compelling and quite disturbing theory—the one that my Afghan friend, the court translator, puts forward. On the basis of his hundreds of interactions with these young men in his professional capacity over the past several years, he believes to have discovered that they are motivated by a deep and abiding contempt for Western civilization. To them, Europeans are the enemy, and their women are legitimate spoils, as are all the other things one can take from them: housing, money, passports. Their laws don’t matter, their culture is uninteresting and, ultimately, their civilization is going to fall anyway to the horde of which one is the spearhead. No need to assimilate, or work hard, or try to build a decent life here for yourself—these Europeans are too soft to seriously punish you for a transgression, and their days are numbered.
And it’s not just the sex crimes, my friend notes. Those may agitate public sentiment the most, but the deliberate, insidious abuse of the welfare system is just as consequential. Afghan refugees, he says, have a particular proclivity to play the system: to lie about their age, to lie about their circumstances, to pretend to be younger, to be handicapped, to belong to an ethnic minority when even the tired eye of an Austrian judge can distinguish the delicate features of a Hazara from those of a Pashtun.
And this is why I do not want unfettered immigration from any country that does not fundamentally share our values. I have a daughter, and I'd hate to have to spend the rest of my life in jail after killing a refugee who attacked her. Read the whole column here. This is why I support Trump's travel ban and increased vetting and as a matter of fact there are some great ideas in this column on that frong. But I'd greatly appreciate it if he could add Afghanistan to the list. So would my daughter.
NOW HERE'S 15 STORIES THAT WILL RESTORE YOUR FAITH IN HUMANITY
THERE ARE NOT WORDS TO DESCRIBE HOW LITTLE I CARE IF OJ GETS OUT OF JAIL OJ Simpson has become a bizarro world cultural touchstone. Many of us remember where we were when the world's slowest car chase unfolded, or where we were when "the verdict" came down. And now today, some in this world are watching a parole hearing and speculating about whether or not he will be paroled. Aside from being the Fatty Arbuckle of our generation, what has OJ done to deserve this sort of attention? He did set the standard for athletes getting in trouble though, although he is the only one I know who actually got away with murder. I hope he just goes away.
IT'S A GOOD TIME TO BE A LANDLORD As more people are renting than any time since 1965. Why? Lots of reason, but mostly home prices, student debt and the freedom of renting. Yes, freedom. The other factor is that some people are simply spooked after the housing crash of 2008, but if you are in that category, you need to rethink your fear. It's still the best way to build some wealth around.
FINALLY A COLLEGE DOES THE RIGHT THING TO ANGRY SNOWFLAKES And it happened at Claremont McKenna College where students blocked a talk by Manhattan Institute's Heather MacDonald on campus. They have suspended some students for as long as a year, and others for a semester. Why not kick them out you ask? Me too. But at least this is a start.